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Last Updated on May 7, 2021 by karissa ancell
With a new school year about to start in a few weeks I thought it would be a good time to update and spruce up this post from last year. I think that it is so important for me as a mom to keep communicating with my daughter so she will feel comfortable talking to me and so that I can stay aware of what is going on in her life. So I am all about opening up communication with these questions to ask kids after school.
These questions will work for me and also for you and your kids. I’m hoping that by doing this now when she’s in elementary school that she will develop the habit of talking to me about what’s going on in her life. Before I know it she will be a teenager and there will be more important things going on in her world and I want her to trust me and feel comfortable talking to me.
Keeping communication open between yourself and your child is so important. Especially when they are in school and away from you for hours each day, You have to make them feel comfortable talking to you so that if something important happens they will feel like they can come to you. I learned the importance of this when my daughter was in kindergarten and was assaulted by another student. I wrote about that experience here.
I was lucky my daughter felt comfortable coming to me and it really made me aware of the importance of talking to her about things on a daily basis. Now not all days does she have a lot to say but I still go through the same questions and if she wants to elaborate on some answers I’m there to listen.
The questions I ask help me to keep informed on what is happening in class, who she’s getting along with and who she isn’t getting along with. If she’s having problems with another student I don’t necessarily need to get involved but I can help her come up with solutions and step in if things start getting out of control.
Now my daughter is a talker and I understand not all kids are but I think you should still aim to ask two or three questions a day just to know what’s going on in your child’s day. There are lots of questions to ask kids but these are just the ones I use. Use whatever question work for you and your kids. The important thing is just to start talking to them on a regular basis.
These are my typical questions to ask after school?
1. Who did you sit with at lunch? What did you talk about?
2. What was your favorite part of your day?
3.What was the worst part of your day?
4. What did you have for lunch? (If it was a hot lunch day.)
5. What did you do and who did you play with at recess and lunch?
6. Tell me something new you learned today?
7. Did anything special happen today?
8. How was (enter a friends name) day? Did you two play together today?
9. Did your teacher read a book today? What was it about?
10. What are you doing in class tomorrow?
Susan says
Your questions are great. I even asked my granddaughter them when I picked her up from her first day of preschool today. I do recommend something that is a bit different. Instead of just asking questions about their day, tell them about yours, as well. Not would this make it less like an interagation, but teach them about openness.
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Jemma @ celery and cupcakes says
It’s so important to communicate with children – really great questions!
Sarah says
Little ones too little for these questions but good to know 🙂
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Ashley LaMar says
Really great questions. I love how open they are so you can just ask and then sit back while they talk. Hopefully little prompting is needed.
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Lauren says
Love this! I did this exact post last year (great minds!) I have been working on a part two (coming soon!)
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Goldi says
Great questions! My son is only in his second week and I think he’s already sick of my questions. I kind of try to ask one or two right off the bat and then he will tell me about all of the things he wants to talk about throughout the rest of the night.
I always ask who he sat with at lunch and who he played with at recess. There is a little boy who has a hard time behaving so I always ask if he had a better day. And best/worst part of the day are always a bonus if I remember, but I am definitely going to add your questions, “Did you learn something new?” and “Did your teacher read a book today?”
Thanks so much!
Karissa says
I hope these questions help.
Brooke @ You're In Brookelynn says
These seem like great questions! I don’t have children, but I can definitely see how opening up communications with them is a great idea!
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Alicia @ Felt With Love Designs says
Great list! Sometimes it’s hard to get them talking…
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Joanna Sormunen says
I ask similar questions. Because when I just ask “What did you do in school today?” My son will answer: “Nothing”. lol
kendall says
Great questions! My little one is starting preschool in September. 🙁
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lauriel says
Good questions – my mom always made sure to engage in thoughtful communication with me as a child as well, and I really appreciate it in retrospect. I’m sure your daughter will too!
xo,
lauriel
EyeForElegance.com
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Neely Stoller says
This is so great for parents to get involved. As a former teacher I think this idea is fantastic!
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Myrabev says
I agree it’s important to communicate with your child so they know they can speak to you about anything. Since I never shut up my parents didn’t want to ask him I told them, my parents call it downloading and boy can I download
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Raewyn says
This is wonderful. It is so important for kids to feel they can talk to their parents about anything. I’m a blabber mouth so I always shared everything, but it is definitely important to ask questions for less talkative kids.
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Kristine Foley - The Foley Fam says
So important! Love the questions you shared! Thanks so much!
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Carly says
As a teacher, I love this! Such great questions!
Sarah says
I love the questions! My kids still like to come home and tell me everything. That will end I know, however I am enjoying it while it lasts. Having an Autistic son I have learned to ask lots of questions to ensure that nothing out of the ordinary was happening. (Not that I don’t think it is equally important to ask my girls, but he is more limited in communication than the girls are.
Daisy says
I’m happy to find this post because I ask my son how his day is and he says good. These questions would help to make better conversation.
Karissa says
I hope they get him talking.
Jess Scull says
My son is starting pre school in a week! I am definitely going to be asking some of these questions! Thank you!
Kristen says
I love this! My little sister goes off to school tomorrow for her first day of Kindergarten and these questions will def come in handy! Thanks for sharing!
Amanda Wooldridge Haney says
My Daughter is only two, but these are great tips for when she gets older. 🙂
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Karissa says
Thanks, she will grow up fast. It’s crazy.
Heather {Woods of Bell Trees} says
Even though we homeschool I think this is great for us because what happens, being that me and my little man spend alllll day together is that we wind up not talking about anything but schoolwork! 🙁 Thanks for the prompts and the idea!
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Karissa says
Your welcome
Amanda Love says
Great questions. I have actually stopped asking too many questions since my kids are older and would prefer me not to ask. My 9 year old though loves sharing. 🙂
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anastasia says
oh this is great! My eldest son is quite reserved and Im always asking him questions to get that conversation going…my youngest is always chatting away happily…some great questions here!
Karissa says
Thanks, I hope this helps get him talking. Mine does nothing but talk.
Avie Tee says
Great series of questions to ask. I do not have any children, but I do think it is important to stay engaged in their “school life”.
Julie S. says
Great list! I’ll be using these!
Linda Carmical says
Perfect list to ask your kids everyday. It sets the tone for your relationship, and shows a true interest in your child(ren).
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Christen says
I always ask those questions too, almost exactly! I want to know every second of their day. They think I am annoying LOL.
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Antionette Blake says
Thanks for sharing at the #WWDParty.
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