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This is a blogging and business topic that has been going around in my head for awhile. I’ve been trying to work out exactly what it is that I want to say and how I want to say it. I think if you’ve really spent anytime on the internet you are aware that the internet isn’t always the nicest place. I see it all over social media and blogs. People being negative and in many cases just plain mean for no real reason that I can think of. I don’t really get the purpose of being mean to people. So I’ve gone around this topic in my head a lot and finally decided that it was time for me to just figure out how to say what I want to say and post it. I think as someone involved in blogging and social media sharing my thoughts about this topic and all things having to do with this blogosphere is part of my responsibility as a blogger. So here we go. 
So I want to start out this post by first saying that I have been so incredibly lucky and blessed so far by the almost exclusively kind and wonderful followers I have both on my blog and throughout social media. I have seen way too many bloggers who have been tortured and disrespected on the internet by cruel people and other than a few maybe rude comments occasionally I have been mostly spared and for that I am very grateful.
That being said there is still a lot of negativity out there that I am aware of. I see it on other blogs and on social media. Even if it isn’t directed at me or my blog I still hate that it is out there and I am aware that as my blog grows and I get more followers that my luck might run out and some of hat negativity might come my way. So for all of you newer bloggers and even those of you who aren’t as new. Here is what I’ve learned when it comes to online negativity.
* As hard as it is try to remember that these people don’t know you and it’s really not personal. I know a lot of really great people who have had some really mean things said to them. It’s not true. They are great people and the people saying those things to them don’t really know them.
*You have to be a positive person online as well. It’s a good example and I believe kindness and goodness attracts the same. So if you wouldn’t say it to someone’s face than don’t say it online. Even things that aren’t cruel still shouldn’t be said sometimes because it’s a little rude and so I think a good rule is to only say things online that are things you would say to someone to their face.
* I’m also careful with what I post. If I really believe in something I will post it because my blog and my platforms are mine and if I believe in things I have a right to share it. I also try to avoid being inflammatory though because I don’t want to share things just to stir up drama. I rarely if ever share things about religion, politics or my parenting choices. I know these can be very personal and hot topic issues and I have my beliefs but I don’t think that all my followers should have the same beliefs. My blog isn’t about my religion or beliefs so it seems unnecessary to post things to stir up drama.
* I think it’s important to be an example of how I want bloggers to be treated. So when I’m on someone’s blog or their social media I am always kind and am careful to not put anything that might be offensive. In life I always tell my daughter that you can’t control other people you can only control your own actions. So I follow that same advice online. I can’t stop mean commentors online but I can be a good example of online behavior.
* Have a policy on negativity: how are you going to handle negativity on your sites. Are you going to ignore it, respond to it or delete it. Figure out what works for you and how you want to handle negativity that works fir you. So far since I haven’t had to deal with much of it I have been mostly ignoring and occasionally deleting it. If things start becoming more negative I will have to come up with a different policy if it becomes necessary.
So I know that nothing I do is going to make the internet a positive place and get rid of negativity but I have to acknowledge that it’s out there. So if you are a blogger or just love being on Social Media I think it’s good to think about how to deal with negative comments and how they make us feel as bloggers.
Also know that my blog and platforms are all about positivism and inspiration. So I will keep continuing to do my best to make my part of the internet a happy and kind place. I hope you will do the same and if you need some kindness on your blog and have had to deal with negative people then know I support you and this community supports you.
Stroller Savvy says
Well said! I am always floored by the negativity and the “trolls” on blogs. One popular blogger that I know shared some of the hateful things she endured on a seemingly innocent post. I think you are right in that the best thing we can do is remain positive and not feed into it.
Stroller Savvy recently posted…7 Reasons Why You Should Date Your Children
Juliet says
Hi Karissa,
I found your blog via “Blogging Boost” and I really like it. I adore your clean design and your great blogging advice. Thrilled to read more 🙂
x, Juliet
Juliet recently posted…Four days in London on a budget
Karissa says
Thank you juliet, I’m glad you found my blog
Liz says
I just try to ignore the negativity. There are so many other awesome things I get from blogging that I just let the negative comments roll off my back!
-Liz
http://www.TheCleanEatingCouple.com
Liz recently posted…Paleo Blueberry Crisp
Yaya says
Great post. I am a “speak my mind” kind of person and I have to remember that what I say might hurt someone else’s feelings, so If I don’t have any thing positive to say about someones post or share on social media, I refrain from saying anything at all because I know I wouldnt want to read negative comments on my accounts either.
Karissa says
I wish more people were like that Yaya, just didn’t say anything at all.
Monica Atkins says
I like how you say your blog is about positivism and inspiration. Our goal for our blog is inspiration as well. You are right, though, it is good to have a policy or guidelines how to handle.
Karissa says
I think it’s so important to set boundaries in your life my blog included on how people treat me.
Michelle says
Great perspective! I’m glad to say I haven’t had much negativity either but your tips are great ones for any blogger!
Michelle recently posted…DIY Kid Art Frames
annabelt says
Sounds like good advice for life in general!
annabelt recently posted…Is Housework Exercise? Review of The Stepford Wives and Clairobics
Debra says
That is a good policy to have! I am surprised by the negativity sometimes!
GiGi Eats says
Blogging is my favorite thing on the face of the planet. I don’t like how it can sometimes seem “high school” but I don’t take part in any of that non-sense! I simply read and comment on what I want and in general I am not a mean person! I try to make everyone happy and smile, 🙂
Michelle Stewart says
What a great post! I love your positive outlook. Life is too short for negativity!
Michelle Stewart recently posted…Batman Party Ideas
Karissa says
I agree Michelle!
Ginae B. McDonald says
Good for you! I don’t understand why others are so mean-spirited, but, it can flow in the forums sometimes 🙁
Ana De- Jesus says
I think it is really important that you have highlighted this issue as it is not just prevalent in the blogging/ internet/ social media industry but in institutions. For years I was bullied and often had a lot of negative comments about the way I look and it have even had hate groups put up against me on social media. It can be difficult to accept negative comments but I have to remind myself that I am stronger than they are and should take pride in the fact that I still remain positive. Thank you for sharing this post it really struck a chord with me.http://www.fadedspring.co.uk
Michelle @ Sunshine and Hurricanes.com says
Anytime you’re dealing with the public, you have to have a thick skin. Not everyone is kind, tactful, or respectful.
Michelle @ Sunshine and Hurricanes.com recently posted…Playing at Disney’s ESPN Wide World of Sports
Bonnie @ Living a Fit and Full Life says
Great advice! Some people can be so mean sometimes.
Bonnie @ Living a Fit and Full Life recently posted…PleasingCare Sonic Rechargeable Face Cleaning Brush & Rechargeable Sliding Nano Facial Steamer Review
Stacey says
I have been lucky in that I have never received mean or negative responses. But like you, I see it out that and I am a bit concerned. Fortunately when I have posted controversial topics, everyone was respectful, even when the completely disagreed with me. I look forward to comments from others that make me think. And I appreciate them considering my point.
Stacey recently posted…My Favorite Teacher Movies
Yona Williams says
I’ve been lucky enough not to encounter a lot of online negativity towards myself. However, I have seen a lot of situations unfold online that have been pretty shocking. To avoid unnecessary issues, I do hold back on some of the things I say or topics so that I do not offend certain people. I just don’t want to deal with the headache.
Yona Williams recently posted…Gift Ideas for Those Who Love Gold
Blanca says
It is really sad how much negativity is out there online now and days 🙁 I just wish more people would be more positive. The only thing is to be positive and hope more people do the same.
eliz frank says
Dear Karissa,
I stopped by to comment because this is a topic dear to my heart. Unfortunately, the blogosphere and the internet are microcosms of the world we live in. There are mean people in this world and mean girls/women in our community of bloggers. While I don’t like to engage in finger pointing, I know how to defend myself from the ugliness.
One policy I have on my blog is to NEVER publish mean/troll comments. I don’t write that stuff and I don’t entertain it on my blog. My life is not perfect but, I made a decision when I started blogging 6+ years ago to add uplifting, positive, informative content to my blog. We all have our challenges and struggles, and I don’t feel the blogosphere is the best forum for EVERYTHING I have experienced. I write about the things that can inform my community, uplift them, and address injustices and that’s it. Let the mean folks continue on their path, I have no time for that.
Keep up the good work! 🙂
Elizabeth
Katie says
Hi Karissa! I love your outlook. I think as bloggers we feel so much better if we can take the high road when faced with trolls. I’m going to save this post for the next time I get a mean comment. 😉
Katie recently posted…Pearl’s Packing Pointers
Lauren says
To my knowledge I have never said anything ride or mean to someone online but I also know that may depend on the tone that someone reads a comment in.
Before I became a blogger I would see rude comments and think “wow that person really gets into it” now as a blogger I see rude comments and think “don’t they know it’s just a person on the other end? I feel so sorry for that author. I hope they’re okay”
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Stephanie Volkert says
I never understood being negative to someone online. I’m thankful I haven’t run across it on my own blog, but like you, I don’t usually post about religion or politics. I have the occasional rant that could be controversial, but having a small amount of followers cuts down on who sees it, which is good, I guess lol.
Stephanie Volkert recently posted…Five on Friday – Wildfires
Karissa says
I’m so not a drama or negativity person. I try to avoid it
Elizabeth says
Good post and well said. Unfortunately the internet does mirror real life and there is always someone . . .
Elizabeth recently posted…Turkish Stuffed Eggplant Recipe
Kim Smith says
There is a lot of negativity on the Internet and I feel it is mostly by people who wouldn’t confront you to your face and be that way. Staying hidden somehow absolves them and they can say what they want. I just ignore them, or even delete the comment. I don’t need to persuade them. Not my circus, not my monkeys .HaHa!
Kim Smith recently posted…What Is That Huge Mystery Weed?
Karissa says
I agree Kim!
Danielle says
I really appreciated this blog post! I want to share this in my weekly series called “Roll Out The Red Carpet Thursday” – I share bloggers’ amazing posts that I’ve found during the week. I hope that’ ok! Have a wonderful day! 🙂
Elle Ay Esse says
Keeping a positive outlook when others are always so negative is really, really difficult. It takes a lot of discipline to not let things get to us, after all, we are only human. I think this post is genius because it shows us that we are, in fact, only human and that we cannot ever stop negativity from coming into our lives. It’s how we deal with it that really matters 🙂
Thanks for sharing!
– E
http://www.eae-design.com/
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Sofie says
I totally agree on setting the example and being kind online! I think the idea of having a policy is a great idea as well! When seeing so much hatred I can only try to fight it back on my own ground and keep my platforms a place of positivity.
Thank you so much for the great ideas and inspiring read Karissa!
~ Sofie
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